Are Kids Drawn to Stricter Teachers?

Question: "I have observed that elementary and junior high school students--even high schoolers--tend to admire the more strict teachers. Common sense would tell us that they would like those who are easier on them. Why do you think they are drawn to the disciplinarians?"

Dr. Dobson Responds:
You are right; teachers who maintain order and demand the most from their students are often the most respected members of the faculty, provided they aren't mean and grouchy. One who can control a class without being unpleasant is almost always esteemed by her students. That is true, first of all, because there is safety in order. When a class is out of control, particularly at the elementary school level, the children are afraid of each other. If the teacher can't make the class behave, how can she prevent a bully from doing his thing? How can she keep the students from laughing at one of the less-able members? Children can be vicious to each other, and they feel good about having a teacher who is strong but kind.

Second, children love justice. When someone has violated a rule, they want immediate retribution. They admire the teacher who can enforce an equitable legal system, and they find great comfort in reasonable social expectations. By contrast, the teacher who does not control her class inevitably allows crime to pay, violating something basic in the value system of children.

Third, children admire strict teachers because chaos is nerveracking. Screaming and hitting and wiggling are fun for about ten minutes; then the confusion begins to get tiresome and irritating.

I have smiled in amusement many times as second- and third-grade children astutely evaluated the relative disciplinary skills of their teachers. They know how a class should be conducted. I only wish all of their teachers were equally aware of this important attribute.

This article was excerpted from Complete Marriage and Family Home Reference Guide. The entire Complete Marriage and Family Home Reference Guide is available at Focus on the Family's Online Resource Center.

Dr. James Dobson is president and founder of Focus on the Family.